One day, I was chatting with an editor about how unfair it was that no one had ever told me about so many challenges I would face as a new father. Not the diapers or the spit-up or any of the stuff you see in big screen comedies. The real stuff.
"Huh," he said. "You should write a book about it."
Another kid, three years, and a ton of research later, here we are. Everyday Secrets for First-Time Dads is nearly complete.
But before I can send it off to agents and pubishers, we need to finish the secret sauce, namely your help with these survey questions. Many fathers have written about their funny and heartwarming exploits in early daddyhood, but few explore the issues that matter--the unforeseen head trips, personal achievements, and the redefinition of our life roles.
I know that sounds heavy, but becoming a dad is heavy stuff, and a lot of things you really want to know when you're in the trenches never gets talked about openly, much less studied and surveyed. It's like some kind of ridiculous club. You don't get to know the inside secrets until it's too late. I think that's wrong.
Moreover, guys want to know what other guys think. What's normal for cryin' out loud? You don't just want to hear about the author's experience. You want to know if the stuff flying around in your skull is unique or average or, frankly, whacked. Uncertainty and doubt can be your worst enemies as a new parent.
That's why I'm doing these surveys. Yes, I want to publish this book. Maybe it'll make money, maybe it won't. But I and millions of other men had a hell of a time as new dads. I want to make the process a little easier for first-timers. In life, we don't often get to help people by saying the right thing at the right time. Maybe just a little more information, a fresh perspective, or the comfort of knowing you're far from alone can make the difference between unbearable stress and quiet contentment. And hey, ladies, if your man is more at ease and informed, your life will get easier too.
Bottom line: One of the key values in Everyday Secrets for First-Time Dads is the result of these surveys. Without that, the book may not get published. I need your help. New, confused dads everywhere need your help. Please--lets do this thing.